I see more and more foreigners around Tokyo, in the clubs trying to pick up girls, but not necessarily all of them realize what are customs and expectations of Japanese girls.
I don’t pretend to know any ultimate solution to “score”, but with the years I learned a few things about Japanese girl’s taste.
First a division need to be made from those that are looking forward to meet a foreigner and those that don’t. There isn’t much help for the latter, but luckily there isn’t many of them. Of course not all foreign countries are equal, and some nationalities have more appeal than others..
All foreigners are expected to magically speak English. Girls want to practice English.. so, not knowing Japanese is not a problem. However, in a situation in which there is someone speaking Japanese fluently, the fluent speaker is likely to make the others feel dumb (it happens to me all the time 8).
Age matters in Japan more than in the west. It’s not so easy to guess the age of a Japanese girl, but it’s important to find out what are their expectations: Girls before 25 are in the playing & thinking about marriage phase. Twenty five and over are instead in the hunting & ready to marry phase. ..clearly, ultimately it’s all about marriage. Now you know that !
So, the great majority of Japanese girls is looking for a serious individual. Someone that is willing to embark in a long term relationship.
Then comes looks. Not looking like an otaku (a nerd) helps a lot. Talking about anime and video games straight away on a first encounter isn’t generally the best thing. If you introduce yourself as a game developer instead, things are quite different (^.^)y~~~.
Facial and body hair is generally not a good thing. The more travelled girls can tolerate it, but the younger ones generally hate it. Shaving everyday is definitely going to help !
With looks comes odor. Japanese men are definitely not odorless, but still, girls are absolutely terrified by bad smell ! American guys are generally pretty clean, but us European aren’t known for being overly zealous with hygiene. Sometimes foreign guys, even those that already live in Japan, walk in an apartment, take off their shoes and reveal 2-3 days old rotten socks !
That’s a big no-no, socks are to be changed every day. Also daily showers are required. In summer possibly twice per day.
Admittedly, I’m sometimes extreme about showers, but my opinion is that it’s always better to err on the safe side.
As clean as I am, I had my struggle with shampooing. At some point I had to change shampoos and I just realized that my daily shampoos weren’t enough. I tried a few things and I finally came one very simple conclusion: just wash better ! I used to have dandruff and I blamed it on shampoos for not being anti-dandruff or not being good enough. While in fact all I had to do was to put more vigour in the shampooing.. and I also use a conditioner after.
Some are afraid to take frequent shampoos because they think that soap is going to drive them bald. That’s actually a misconception, because greasy scalps turn into hell when not properly cleaned and hair follicles have nothing to gain and everything to lose from an irritated scalp.
So in the end it’s not so difficult:
- Be kind and honest.
- Don’t be a nerd: try to refrain a bit.
- Don’t smell bad: showers !
- Don’t be hairy: shave !
Having bad teeth instead isn’t such a crime as far as I realize. But of course a nice smile can only help 8)
Last thing about smell. I’m told that one can actually get sick in the armpits (!). Unusually strong smell comes out and surgery seems to be the only solution (really ?!). Apparently this sick armpits thing came up in a big way as some Japanese personality shared his ordeal with bad smell and his armpit surgery ! …ho ho ho ho !!
I personally think that showers and deodorant-stick are all that most people need.. but who knows ? 8)
As far as the main topic goes, there is a lot more to it, but I just wanted to share a few important points.
Ultimately it’s all about individuals and girls just want someone they can trust. So, if you are a foreigner looking for some fun in Japan, try to be nice and honest upfront. I see a lot of foreigners getting lucky with gullible girls that end up heart broken.
Posted by Davide Pasca in Society, Japan, Japanese girls