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July 19th, 2006

Hurry up !

I find myself badly wanting to change jobs.. but I’m not sure what I want to do anymore.
I know what I like, but I can’t afford the price. I would just like to take a break and study things, do experiments. I would really like to continue study math and Japanese language. However I don’t have much freedom. I’m a mature and self-sustained person. I have to work to live a decent life, especially here in Japan where I have no family to support me.
Programming games may seem pretty interesting, but my interests seem to always go against company needs. Companies need to make money. No need to make cool looking 3D graphics, the key is to do anything that is convenient.
I understand that economy is important and I think I’ve been pretty good at adapting with my employers past and current. However it seems that I’m always helping companies to keep their business up, while I get paid as a game programmer: not much really !
If I have to work on things that I don’t really like, shouldn’t I just go for an even more boring job that pays me a lot more ? I feel cheated because game companies think that their employees are inherently loyal idiots that will always stick to the game business. Employees tamed by their unwillingness to look outside the game business.
Fack that ! I’m willing to trash my game programmer experience (which is actually going to be useful anyway) ..I want to make more money ! I want to work less !! Work isn’t teaching me much.. program this, program that, no real challenges, I need challenges, I want to learn new things, I want to learn important things. If I have to do a job where I spend the whole day bored, I may as well go flip burgers. It wont challenge my brain much, but at least I can communicate with people.
I think I’m about to explode.. a big change is going to happen soon, somehow.
It’s sad that companies like people that “can stand the pressure”.. it sounds like they are looking for tough employees, but in truth they are just looking for people with little expectations. People that are either apathetic or willing to accept just about anything to keep their position.

I need change !

Posted by Davide Pasca in Society, Diary

This entry was posted on Wednesday, July 19th, 2006 at 12:51 pm and is filed under Society, Diary. You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

6 Responses to “Hurry up !”

  1. Ragin' Lion says:

    What was that old Captain Planet saying … “The Power is YOURS!” You should check some of my comments from your previous blog entries … unfortunately for a lot of folks out there changing jobs equals EOS (end of security) and many aren’t willing to take that kind of “risk” … especially if they’ve a family to support. 8P

    Sometimes the “trick” is just finding that happy medium … sometimes the “trick” is to move on to some other line of work or employer (if it’s feasable for one’s life situation).

    I’d say (for the time being) it’s wise to “cool down” a bit so that you’ll be able to make a more objective decision as to what you want to do. Nothing like making a change with both eyes shut!

    If switching jobs is what needs to be done and it won’t equate to a long term EOS situation, then by all means do so … but I think it’s generally a good idea to have a long term game-plan of sorts anyway.

    P.S.
    If I have to do a job where I spend the whole day bored, I may as well go flip burgers.
    Yeaaaaaaaaah … I think you’d go crazy in less than a month! I can hear you already thinking about the specular reflections off the bun and greasy meat. 8P

  2. Davide Pasca says:

    > Ragin’ Lion
    I’m not sure I need to cool down. People are boring when they are mindful. Courage comes in small quantities and one should try use it while it’s still at hand.

    I also got somewhat scared of your suggestion to go to a large company where they have a cafeteria, gym and a million other benefits (the dreaded word).. all meant to make everyone fairly happy but nobody really happy.

    Working for a small company is a pain, because there is little money and one often has to do whatever it takes to keep it floating.
    Working for a huge one however is bound to reduce individuality at a minimum.. it is very important that I get hired as an individual.

    I’ll never forget my first day at SquareSoft, where I accidentally got mixed with a dozen play testers.. I work hard because I want to be considered as an individual.

    ..perhaps I’m making it too big, but I’m definitely going to make sure that I won’t get hired as a “peeon” 8P

  3. rince says:

    did you put in your resume, that your whole body is cleanly shaved?

  4. Davide Pasca says:

    > rince
    I put that in the special skills.. it’s not easy !!

  5. Ragin' Lion says:

    I guess while you’re flaming hot, I might as well add some fuel to the fire! 8P

    I also got somewhat scared of your suggestion to go to a large company where they have a cafeteria, gym and a million other benefits (the dreaded word).. all meant to make everyone fairly happy but nobody really happy.

    Come on! Don’t chicken out on me here! That’s like saying that you’re going to stay away from a beautiful lady (who’s interested in talking with you) that also happens to have a decent character simply because the beautiful ladies you knew in the past were evil soul-suckers!

    I’m no expert in this area, but it’s generally in a company’s interest to keep it’s employees in some state of satisfaction so that the company will continue to prosper. “Satisfaction” can mean anything from “benefits” to “working on challenging and intersting projects”.

    Unless you’re self-employed, “peon” is a relative term; there’s always going to be someone you’re going to have to answer to.

    Here’s another way to look at a company from a different perspective:

    Version A
    Companies Prime Directive: Make $$$

    Thus in order to generate $$$, they can just hire many “cogs” in the giant machinery to slave away. The cog gets worn out, they simply replace it with a new (and eager) one.

    Version B
    Companies Prime Directive: Make $$$

    In order to generate $$$, they hire quality individuals who they do their best to meet those individuals’ needs that fit within the company’s (long term) goals. The employees are the company’s true value and assets and it realizes this. Because of this fact, it tries to provide an environment where the employees can thrive and do their best work and not be distracted by the “little things”.

    Anyway … there’s a reason why many people flock to Google … and there’s a reason why Google has really nice “benefits” for the folks who work there.

    Of course, we’re not talking about Google, but you get the idea! 8P

    At least apply to that place and see if they’re really “too good to be true”; you always have the option of turning them down! 8P

    I want some results, enough talk!! 8P

  6. Davide Pasca says:

    > Ragin’ Lion
    I think I’m mostly dubious about large Japanese companies, as they tend to push less for individuality.
    However I shouldn’t let those preconceptions scare me off, I guess !

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